The following rules and guidelines are generally common sense observations and behaviors. The problem is that when some people get on a social website, they forget the good manners and common sense their parents taught them. There are also some rather unusual circumstances and unique opportunities that we generally don’t face in the real world which often comes up in the land of the internet. This is a guide on handling those opportunities, circumstances, and up close personal encounters with total strangers.
1. Don’t request that I confirm you as a family member when you are not.
I would be delighted to confirm my sisters, children, husband, and any other members of my extended family. But I will not confirm total strangers as family members– and really, I don’t understand why anyone would even make such a request, but they do. I can only assume that it’s a private fantasy.
2. Don’t tag me in photographs.
There are a couple exceptions to this rule. It’s okay to tag me if 1) I’m actually in the photograph; 2) You are a family member or a close personal friend who wants to make sure that I’ll see this photo.
Now…I’m assuming that I don’t have to include drawn-out definitions of ‘family member’ and ‘close personal friend’. I will state plainly that neither of these exceptions pertain to random pieces of internet art from strangers, photos that include people I don’t know from places I’ve never been, or those cheesy ‘birthday’ posters which seem to come in twenty at a time.
3. Don’t post apps on my page.
For those people who are into apps, fine and dandy, if this rocks your boat and you enjoy playing with it– by all means, knock yourself out. But I don’t do apps, plain and simple. I will block apps that are posted to my page. And I really would like to warn people who do dabble with apps that many of them carry viruses, and I’ve personally experienced this– enough times and with enough trouble and problems that I decided…no more apps, period.
4. Don’t be rude or asinine.
People tend to be much more bold about what they will say to you on the internet than they would probably be in a face to face encounter…I hope.
A perfect example of this is when I post updates for products or services for my online metaphysical shops and tarot readings. The last time I did this is when I got a new shipment of jewelry in and posted it to Enchanted Jewelry. This guy comes on with this statement: “Do you not know that the Goddess is not for sale.”
The Goddess may not be for sale, but my jewelry is.
My online shops and readings are a business. I am not a rich woman. I am not in the grand position of being able to give away merchandise that I’ve purchased from other vendors or created myself with materials that I‘ve paid good money for; and I cannot afford to spend hours doing tarot readings without being reimbursed for my time. Facebook is a wonderful venue, not only for making friends and socializing, but for networking with your business, expanding business contacts, and getting your products and information out there.
Bottom line here is if you are rude or obnoxious, I have no qualms about hitting the block button. I will not tolerate assholes— either in the real world, or in the land of Facebook.
5. Before you come on to a woman with a cheesy pick up line, check her profile and look at the relationship status.
I’m married. My husband and a link to his page are right there– under my profile photo. I don’t know how much plainer I can make it.
I’m at Facebook for a few simple reasons: 1) to meet other like-minded people in the pagan community; 2) to network my business and my website; 3) to advertise my book, as well as future projects coming up. I thoroughly enjoy the majority of people I’ve met at Facebook and consider it my privilege to be able to call them ‘friend’. This medium has given us an invaluable way to meet people we would otherwise never have had the opportunity of crossing paths with.
*Just a note…I’m amazed at the number of men who will try to pick up a woman at a social site apparently without looking past a profile pic to read any information about her. (Tsk, tsk.) I can tell you that even if I were young and single, I wouldn’t give the time of day to someone who did not have enough common sense, courtesy, or interest in finding out about me before contacting me. I would naturally assume that they had the attention span of a gnat.
6. Do not include my name in mass Facebook messages.
I repeat…do not do this.
This is one of the most irritating things to receive in your Facebook message box; and it’s usually from people I don’t know, dealing with subjects I don’t care about. Imagine, if you can, receiving ten of these messages at one time, each message sent simultaneously to fifty people. Once those fifty people start responding to the original message, you will have about 500 messages cramming your inbox.
And yes, I know that several groups send mass messages, and I will receive the bulk message because ‘you are a member of this group’. Well, I hate to tell you, but your mass emails can be irritating as well, and I’ve deleted several groups who make a habit of this practice. I know, I know…you have information to get out there. Well, I can tell you that I’m a member of a secret group here at Facebook– and I have never sent out a mass Facebook message to its members…that’s what our private website and emails are for.
7. Do not add me to a group without my permission.
You’d think this is one of those things that goes without saying– you’d think.
If you are the administrator of a group and you feel I might be interested, send me a query message telling me about your group, with an invitation to join. Odds are, I’m probably not going to join, but you never know. There are so many groups out there, many of them genuinely interesting, but I have only so much time and energy to spend at Facebook.
The last surprise I need is a flurry of emails coming in from a group that I’ve never heard of nor had any contact with previous to being added. Bottom line…If you spontaneously add me to your group, odds are I will just as spontaneously leave the group– and I will block you.
And that’s about all this Witch has to say for today.
Let Your Magick Shine.
Kindness & consideration go a long way.